DrF DIY

Giving Snupe some competition...

Taken from an email to my Beloved, while I was in the process of furnishing my newly-acquired apartment in Paris

"All the appliances arrived this morning. The washing machine fits beautifully. I'm going to get the plumber to install it this evening, as well as have a look at the bog. The fridge only fits if you turn it sideways, so you have to go out of the Kitchen to get something out of it... which is good if you want to get a beer from the living room and not such a huge hassle if you are cooking. It fits beautifully. I had a nightmare with the very last light fitting...

It's always like that, innit? I measured, drilled, screwed, connected the wires, inserted the bulb, put on the cover, breathed a huge sigh of satisfaction, flicked the switch... nothing. Rien. Nada. Fokoll. So, change the bulb. Nuthing. Disconnect wires, reconect. Zip. Stamp feet in frustration and emit a long, low moan of anguish. Reinstall the whole light fitting again, as above. Flick switch, fokkol. Go to fuse box and switch on ALL switches that can be done, go back to bathroom... EUREKA! It's working! Dance about snapping fingers goin "yeah baby". Switch off light... light stays on. Other bathroom light (which has its own switch) switches off, light without its own switch stays on. Stoopid frogs have wired the ****er to the same circuit as the heater! Go figure. Remove light fitting once again, swearing violently in French. I now have to somehow find a ****ing light switch for the bathroom. Am going to see if the plumber has any ideas."