The Christmas Porcupine

Of all the animals in the world, none is as amazing as the Christmas Porcupine.

The giraffe might have a long neck, but the Christmas Porcupine has law degree. The kangaroo might have powerful back legs, but the Christmas Porcupine has a Range Rover. The arctic fox has a warm winter coat, but the Christmas Porcupine has a father squirrel hat. The kudu is a herbivore, but the Christmas Porcupine is a vegan.

The Christmas Porcupine knows whether you're using leaded or unleaded, whether your aircon is CFC free and whether you have separate bins for paper, glass and plastic. The Christmas Porcupine gives you 10 bonus points if you belong to a registered charity, and he puts a gold star next to your name every time you give a jersey to a homeless person. But if you were pro Ronald Regan or have your hair in a mullet, the Christmas Porcupine might blacklist you.

So every hour of every day, be aware of the Christmas Porcupine.

Even if you're Jewish, because the Christmas Porcupine is also a rabbi.

The end.